Saturday, January 31, 2009
It was also very neat to listen to Spunky read. She can read the "Easy Reader" books pretty quickly now and is soon to be reading the bigger ones. She is doing SO much better than she was at the beginning of the year! I was beginning to worry until I kept reminding myself she is only 6yrs and in the First grade! lol I personally believe they expect way to much from the younger kids these days, but that is another rant all together!
Oh my gosh Spunky is so cute! She has been reading since she finished dinner almost an hour ago. She just came up to me and said "I can read now, I am so excited! I am going to do this everyday!". I am so happy for her she seems so excited to read now and I think that makes all the difference!
Friday, January 30, 2009
1. I'd really like to have all my laundry done right now.
2. OUCH is the word you'd most often hear me say if I stubbed my toe.
3. Possession is nine-tenths of the law.
4. I think Captain Jack Sparrow is SO cute!
5. Marshmallows and fire go together like chocolate and peanut butter!
6. Time goes on and on.
7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to cooking Salmon for the first time. I have always been to scared of fish and now I feel I should jump right in, tomorrow my plans include buying mice for the snake and finishing the laundry and Sunday, I want to clean the fish tank.
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Thursday, January 29, 2009
Honestly I have to tell you it was harder to get them all out of school in time to be at the appointment. The boy is in a different school this year and so I wrote him a note to give his teacher at the beginning of class so he could find out what to do. When I got there he was not where I asked him to meet me so of course I went off to the office. They let me know that he should have brought the note to them and then they would have had him meet me. One thing lead to another and off I drove to the other side of the school to see if he was waiting for me there and he was. So off we went to get the girls in the cold wet weather, did I mention that Texans cannot drive in cold wet weather.................. We get to the girl's school and of course they are not waiting in the office for us because you know that would be too easy! lol Since we were at least 10mins behind schedule, I was trying my best to hurry up and be careful all at the same time and we made it barely on time and all alive!
Wednesday, January 28, 2009
Tuesday, January 27, 2009
Obesity ‘Virus’ Spreads Like Common Cold, Scientists Say
"Obesity can be “caught” as easily as a common cold from other people’s coughs, sneezes and dirty hands, scientists said Monday.
The condition has been linked to a highly-infectious virus which causes sniffles and sore throats.
Nikhil Dhurandhar, an associate professor at The Pennington Biomedical Research Center, in Baton Rouge, La., said the virus, known as AD-36, infects the lungs then whisks around the body, forcing fat cells to multiply and also causing sore throats.
“When this virus goes to fat tissue it replicates, making more copies of itself and in the process increases the number of new fat cells, which may explain why the fat tissue expands and why people get fat when they are infected with this virus,” Dhurandhar said."
Here is my two cents you can take it or leave it!!
Ok so many different things entered my brain when I read this article that I cannot even begin to list them all. So let's just start with a few. I cannot see how Obesity can be a virus maybe it is socially contagious, but NOT a virus!! Seriously if it is than why isn't every person in the world HUGE!! I also feel that this is yet another way to give people "an out" or an excuse so that they do not have to take responsibility for their own actions or god forbid have self control. They can just blame it on the Obesity virus!
Monday, January 26, 2009
1. What was your favorite subject in grade school?
My favorite subject in grade school was Science.
Why did you enjoy this subject so much?
I think I enjoyed it most because it always kept my interest. lol
What was your favorite part about this subject?
I love doing experiments, just to see what will happen next and to discover the way the world works.
2. Tell me about your best friend in grade school. Do you still keep in touch?
Sadly we do not keep in touch anymore. Our mothers are still good friends and have been forever.
If not, why did the friendship dissolve?
We had a falling out when Princess was about six months old and have not talked since. She told my grandfather about some things that were happening in my life that she had no right to disclose to anyone and I was very rude to her about it when I found out. I wish I had not spoken to her that way and had listened more to her about why she did it. Looking back I realize she was only trying to help.
3. Do you remember your first day of school?
Nope I don't remember the very first day I went to school that was way to long ago! lol
If not your very first day, then please tell us about the earliest memory of your first day of school - how did you feel?
I honestly cannot come up with a first day of school memory, but I do know that I always dreaded going back to school. In fact on the night before the first day I almost always had the same nightmare and that did not help things at all!!
Did it take long for you to make new friends? Do you remember anything about the classroom or the teacher?
I was really shy and still am so it always takes me longer to make friends.
4. Let’s jump to middle school. What were your middle school years like?
My middle school years were not the best, but they were not horrible I guess either. I was never popular and I got made fun of quite a bit. I always felt fat, but looking back I realize that I got my "adult" body a bit earlier than most and so that was probably a big cause of the teasing
Did you have a lot of friends?
I would not say that I had a lot of friends. I did have several girlfriends that I hung out with on a regular basis and that was fine with me!
Did you adjust quickly or slowly to the change from grade school?
The adjustment for me from grade school to middle school was not really that big of a deal and happened quite fast. The biggest reason was I went to a small private school for grades k-8 and it was all in the same building with people I had known for a long time. The only thing that really changed was that we started to change rooms for certain classes and we had lockers.
What was your favorite subject in middle school?
My favorite subject in middle school would have to be Science again! lol Same reasons as above!
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Sunday, January 25, 2009
Saturday, January 24, 2009
For more photos and this week's PhotoHunt check out: tnchick.com
Friday, January 23, 2009
Hi all, another week is almost over and it is time for yet another weekly installment of Friday Fill-Ins! Janet asks the questions and my answers are underlined! :)
1. Oh, I am so ready for this weekend!
2. Our new Pres means changes, big and little and I for one am really excited!
3. During the holidays, I try to slow down and not become a rushed mess! lol
4.Holy shit; are you kidding me???
5. Right now I'd like to be done with next week!
6.My computer is my favorite gadget, although I do know that is not really a gadget! lol
7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to picking up T-man for the weekend, tomorrow my plans include taking the girls to Sam's birthday party and hopefully not much else and Sunday, I want to watch the next episode of Big Love!!!
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Thursday, January 22, 2009
I am glad that we know what is wrong and that it is something that is treatable, but it still does not make it any less scary for all of us. She has seen her brother deal with asthma, have attacks and all the things that he has to go through and with her only being 6yrs old that was weighing heavily on her little mind. So last night her and I sat down and had a big talk about what it means for her and I tried my best to calm her fears. It was really hard to watch her cry and explain to me why she was so scared especially I think because she is so little. So I thought is fitting to take a picture of her new cute "bear" spacer and her new inhaler!
Wednesday, January 21, 2009
Tuesday, January 20, 2009
If you have raised kids (or been one), and gone through the pet syndrome, including toilet flush burials for dead goldfish,
Overview: I had to take my son's lizard to the vet.
Here's what happened:
Just after dinner one night, my son came up to tell me there was "something wrong" with one of the two lizards he holds prisoner in his room.
"He's just lying there looking sick," he told me. "I'm serious, Dad. Can you help?"
I put my best lizard-healer expression on my face and followed him into his bedroom. One of the little lizards was indeed lying on his back, looking stressed. I immediately knew what to do.
"Honey," I called, "come look at the lizard!"
"Oh, my gosh!" my wife exclaimed. "She's having babies."
"What?" my son demanded. "But their names are Bert and Ernie, Mom!"
I was equally outraged.
"Hey, how can that be? I thought we said we didn't want them to reproduce," I said accusingly to my wife.
"Well, what do you want me to do, post a sign in their cage?" she inquired (I think she actually said this sarcastically!).
"No, but you were supposed to get two boys!" I reminded her, (in my most loving, calm, sweet voice, while gritting my teeth).
"Yeah, Bert and Ernie!" my son agreed.
"Well, it's just a little hard to tell on some guys, you know," she informed me (Again with the sarcasm!).
By now the rest of the family had gathered to see what was going on. I shrugged, deciding to make the best of it.
"Kids, this is going to be a wondrous experience," I announced "We're about to witness the miracle of birth."
"Oh, gross!" they shrieked "Well, isn't THAT just great? What are we going to do with a litter of tiny little lizard babies?" my wife wanted to know.
We peered at the patient. After much struggling, what looked like a tiny foot would appear briefly, vanishing a scant second later.
"We don't appear to be making much progress," I noted.
"It's breech," my wife whispered, horrifie d.
"Do something, Dad!" my son urged.
"Okay, okay." Squeamishly, I reached in and grabbed the foot when it next appeared, giving it a gentle tug. It disappeared. I tried several more times with the same results.
"Should I call 911?" my eldest daughter wanted to know.
"Maybe they could talk us through the trauma." (You see a pattern here with the females in my house?)
"Let's get Ernie to the vet," I said grimly. We drove to the vet with my son holding the cage in his lap.
"Breathe, Ernie, breathe," he urged.
"I don't think lizards do Lamaze," his mother noted to him. (Women can be so cruel to their own young I mean what she does to me is one thing, but this boy is of her womb, for God's sake.).
The vet took Ernie back to the examining room and peered at the little animal through a magnifying glass.
"What do you think, Doc, a C-section?" I suggested scientifically.
"Oh, very interesting," he murmured. "Mr. and Mrs. Cameron, may I speak to you privately for a moment?"
I gulped, nodding for my son to step outside.
"Is Ernie going to be okay?" my wife asked.
"Oh, perfectly," the vet assured us. "This lizard is not in labor. In fact, that isn't EVER going to happen. . Ernie is a boy. You see, Ernie is a young male. And occasionally, as they come into maturity, like most male species, they um...um...masturbate. Just the way he did, lying on his back." He blushed, glancing at my wife.
We were silent, absorbing this.
"So, Ernie's just...just...excited," my wife offered.
"Exactly," the vet replied, relieved that we understood.
More silence. Then my vicious, cruel wife started to giggle. And giggle. And then even laugh loudly.
"What's so funny?" I demanded, knowing, but not believing that the woman I married would commit the upcoming affront to my flawless manliness.
Tears were now running down her face. "It's just that I'm picturing you pulling on its...its...teeny little..."She gasped for more air to bellow in laughter once more.
"That's enough," I warned. We thanked the vet and hurriedly bundled the lizard and our son back into the car.. He was glad everything was going to be okay.
"I know Ernie's really thankful for what you did, Dad," he told me.
"Oh, you have NO idea," my wife agreed, collapsing with laughter.
Two lizards: $140.
One cage: $50.
Trip to the vet: $30.
Memory of your husband pulling on a lizard's winkie:
Moral of the story: Pay attention in biology class.
Lizards lay eggs
Monday, January 19, 2009
1. You have just been hired to clean your own home, what is your first complaint?
Gosh I have to choose just one? I am telling you right from the start I am NOT a good housekeeper, never have been honestly. So I think my first complaint would have to be with the bathroom or the baseboards! Those always seem to need more attention than I have time or want to give!
2. Are you able to ignore a ringing telephone?
Yes I am able to ignore a ringing phone and I do it quite often.
How often do you allow a ringing phone to go to voice mail?
I almost always allow the phone to ring to VM unless it is the kids school, my mom or I am in an especially good mood.
Do you answer your cell phone, out in public, every time it rings? Or do you silence it and get back to it when you’re in a more private area?
I do not answer the cell phone every time it rings regardless of whether I am at home or in public. Although I am more likely to answer it if I am somewhere more private, but then again it depends on my mood more than anything else
How often would you say you’re on your home phone? Your cell phone? Do you like talking on the phone or do you view it as a necessary communication tool?
I am not really on the phone very much to be honest, I HATE it and view it only as a necessary communication tool!
3. When did you last go for a bike ride?
Hummm I think the last time I rode my bike was just a few weeks ago and I need to do it more often!
Do you own a bike?
Yes I do and I LOVE it!!
Do you encourage your children to ride bikes?
I do encourage my children to ride their bikes. Mainly because I think it gives you an awesome sense of accomplishment to learn how to ride and it is a wonderful way to get around, all the while getting some exercise while having fun! Funny part is my oldest refuses to learn to ride! He has had a bike for years now, but will NOT put forth the effort to ride it. It really bugs me I have to tell you.
Given the most popular New Year’s resolution of losing weight, would you consider putting bicycle riding as one of your exercise options? Why or why not?
I would definitely consider bike riding as an exercise option, I enjoy riding my bike A LOT more than walking that is for sure.
4. If you had to name a smell that always makes you nostalgic, what would it be?
As weird as this is going to sound the first thing that comes to mind is cigarette smoke outside on a cold winter day. I used to smoke way back when I was in high school and we were always outside crammed together to keep warm all while smoking during our lunch break. lol
What sorts of memories does the smell evoke?
When Jeremy is outside having his cig break in the winter months I like to go out there and join him just so I can smell the smoke. It takes me back to those good times when I was young and invincible, when all my troubles in the world were about homework, my latest boyfriend and who I was going to spend the night with that weekend! Otherwise I HATE cigarette smoke, go figure!
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Sunday, January 18, 2009
- Write a post about the award, link back to the person who gave you the award.
- Nominate at least 7 other blogs.
- Add links to those blogs on your blog.
- Leave a message for the nominees on their blogs.
- Name 10 honest random things about yourself.
1. I have streaks of gray in my hair like the Frankenstein's bride. lol
2. I am incredibly compulsive about how certain things line up on my desk.
3. I HATE, I mean HATE the telephone with a passion! For no real reason either it just causes me anxiety and stress. Sad part is once I get started talking to someone I am comfy with you cannot get me to shut up.
4. I love playing World Of Warcraft and I do not care that I am a big ole dork.
5. I kill plants! Well not on purpose, but I cannot keep plants alive any kind even ivy it's kinda sad!
6. I am not myself if I do not have at the LEAST 8hrs of sleep!
7. I am scared of butterflies or well anything that flies near my face.
8. I pick things up with my toes a lot and I am deadly when pinching with them. lol
9. I cannot touch anything made out of paper while my fingers are wet.
10. My fingernails HAVE to be long or I cannot deal with touching anything.
Gosh as far as who to tag, I am going to follow Sheila's lead and say anyone Honest join right in, but please leave me a comment so I can see your answers! :)
Saturday, January 17, 2009
Friday, January 16, 2009
1. Enough with the baby momma drama already!
2. The conflict in the Gaza Strip causes me to be conflicted.
3. I've been craving omelets lately! lol
4. Jeremy always makes me laugh.
5. I wish I could go to Disney World next week.
6. Old friends have been on my mind lately.
7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to hanging out with the girls, tomorrow my plans include chillin with the family and Sunday, I want to watch the season premiere of Big Love!!!
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Thursday, January 15, 2009
So with that said I am determined to get a good head start this year on losing the 75lbs that I have to lose in full! While reading one my favorite blogs 5mins for mom a few days ago I came across their awesome contest called "Will Your New Year's Resolution Win You A Wii Fit?" and I knew I just had to join in! While reading about the contest, I noticed that they mention a site called WeightView that is all about visual motivation to help you lose the weight. Well visual motivation can be a HUGE motivating factor for me and so I had to jump right in and submit a photo!
WeightView will take your photo and remove up to 50lbs so that you can see what you will look like after you lose the weight! I submitted my photo and took off the max 50lbs so that I could see what I would look like when I was almost at my ideal weight and the results are below. I have to tell you seeing myself in the after photo has really helped to motivate me to eat better and drink more water. Now if I could only get my butt to the gym! lol
Here is the before and after photo that I submitted to WeightView:
Wednesday, January 14, 2009
It took FOREVER in the hospital, Jeremy was there for two hours before he was seen by the doctor. Before you say that is not long we were there for a scheduled appointment so you would figure that he would not have to wait two hours to be seen. I dropped him off at 2:25 went to pick up the girls who I might add seem to think that they can do whatever they want on their walk to the car after school, but that is a different rant altogether......... We ran by the house so I could go pee cause I cannot seem to go more than 10mins without using the bathroom anymore! lol Than we were off to the hospital to pick up the man. We arrive, park in the garage, talk to the attendant about having our parking ticket validated and head off to the doctor's office. We walk in and I notice Jeremy is still sitting in his same spot so I ask "Have you seen the doctor yet?" and he gives me that look you know that look right? lol
So we hang out with him cause we have no where to be and I call mom to make sure the boy has made it off the bus and to her house. Oh did I mention we were in the basement so my cell would not work so I actually took the elevator up a few floors walked out of the building and then called mom. I let her know we were good and asked if he was there yet to which she responded "Is this a tutoring day?" all of the sudden I realized "Oh no is it Wednesday?"!!!! He has tutor today and has been sitting in front of the school for over an hour!!!! Now all at the same time I feel like the worst mom ever along with panic, horror, humor and a touch of OH FXXK!!! lol
Breath, breath I tell myself all while freaking out and practically running back to the elevator to figure out what to do next. I run down and let Jeremy know what is wrong and he says to me "Don't worry he is a big boy and I am sure he is fine, we will get him as soon as we leave." It is now 5:15pm he got out of tutor at 4pm and we are in the middle of town. 5 o'clock traffic is hell in Austin, Tx it will take us at least 30mins to get to him and that is IF we leave right now! So now the real freaking out begins because we have not yet gotten Jeremy's scripts or gone by to have his blood drawn! At this point I realize there is a courtesy phone on the wall behind us, THANK GOD! I use it to call mom to see if she can get a hold of my daddio, who should be on his way home and ask him to pick up the boy.
We did not leave the hospital till 6pm!!! I still had no idea if the boy had been picked up or was ok until the signal finally returned to my phone and I received my dad's voice mail letting me know all was ok! Whew!!! I went to pick him up at my mom's who is across the street and he let me know I was being silly for worrying like I did, but he is my first born and I think I will always worry at least a little bit. I cried when I picked him up, it was really pretty sad and I felt totally silly! I guess now I will try not to worry so much about the boy if he has to wait and I know to plan to spend more time at the hospital when Jeremy has these appointments!
Tuesday, January 13, 2009
and finally here is the finished project!!Find out more about Tackle It Tuesday here.
Monday, January 12, 2009
Honestly I do not have any book on my nightstand. I have not been much of a reader in the past five or so years. I seem to have a serious issue with concentrating long enough to read anything more than a children's book. lol I honestly do not remember the last book I read. I am currently reading A New Earth by Eckhart Tolle, it is actually my mom's book and I have been reading it for a few months now. I find it to be a very interesting and enlightening book to read. I do not think I read any book all the way through during 2008, but I did try to read several.
2. Name three blogfriends that have inspired you. Now please tell us how these blogfriends have inspired you.
Melody from Slurping Life has inspired me with her outlook on life and the way she so seamlessly appears to handle all life's ups and downs even with all that she has been handed!
Sheila from Ma Vie Folle has inspired me by just being herself! She has a way of making me think about things from a different POV and I love her awesome sense of humor! ;)
Carrie from Chocolate the Other white meat inspires me by being able to home school her children with the patience that I do not have, but wish I did. I also feel a connection with her because I too am Bipolar and that definitely makes you think of things from a whole other place.
3. How far do you live from the place where you grew up as a kid? Tell us about the place you grew up - would you choose to go back there and raise your own family (if you have one)? Why or why not?
LOL! Well I actually live not more than a mile from my childhood home, so I would and I am raising my family here. I love this neighborhood it is safe, small, conveniently located near all the things one needs and filled with all my childhood memories! IMO you just cannot get better than that!!
4. Finish this line: Absence makes the heart……(please do not say “grow fonder”.) How long do you think is ‘too long’ to be away from your loved ones?
Absence makes the heart long for the one it loves! I would say for me "too long" would be more than a few days. This past August I went out of town to visit a few of my girlfriends and was gone 4 days that was long enough for me. I was definitely homesick when I left even though I was sad to be leaving such wonderful friends behind.
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Sunday, January 11, 2009
Saturday, January 10, 2009
Enjoy and if you would like to check out a not your normal run of the mill mommy forum come visit us at Our Mom Spot!
Only in America ......do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.
Only in America.....do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a diet coke.
Only in America.....do banks leave both doors open and then chain the pens to the counters.
Only in America.....do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put our useless junk in the garage.
Only in America......do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight.
Only in America.....do they have drive-up ATM machines with Braille lettering.
Why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin?
Why women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed??
Why don't you ever see the headline 'Psychic Wins Lottery'???
Why is 'abbreviated' such a long word????
Why is it that doctors call what they do 'practice'????
Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid made with real lemons????
Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?????
Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?
Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food??
Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes? ??
Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections???
You know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes? Why don't they make the whole plane out of that stuff?!
Why don't sheep shrink when it rains??!
Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together???
If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal??
Who was the mean person that put the "s" in the word "lisp"?
We have Preparation-H, what happened to preparations A-G?
If an endangered animal is eating an endangered plant, what do we do then?
Friday, January 9, 2009
1. It's January and I am ready for the summer to be here already!
2. Honestly, sex is what I crave most right now.
3. Cork and wine go together like cheese and crackers!
4. Chocolate is oh so nourishing. lol
5. Let us dare to DREAM!!
6. I am the most comfortable in my home.
7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to having a nice, calm, quiet dinner at the Olive Garden with my wonderful hubby w/o any kiddos WOOHOO, tomorrow my plans include gosh for once I have no plans, we will probably work a bit on the yard today it seriously needs some attention and Sunday, I want to make it through the T-man exchange w/o attacking his mom!!!!!
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Thursday, January 8, 2009
Wednesday, January 7, 2009
Tuesday, January 6, 2009
Here is our movie bookshelf before the big purge!!All the movies before we weeded some out!and finally the after shot(plz excuse the dirty glass on the snake aquarium)! lolFind out more about Tackle It Tuesday here.
Monday, January 5, 2009
To make sure this never happened to me, I got an and ran a single wire along the top of the fence. Actually, I got the biggest cattle charger Tractor Supply had, made for 26 miles of fence. I then used an 8 ft. long ground round, drove 7.5 feet into the ground. The ground rod is the key, with the more you have in the ground, the better the fence works.
One day I'm mowing the back yard with my cheapo Walmart 6hp big wheel push mower. The hot wire is broken and laying out in the yard. I knew for a fact that I unplugged the charger. I pushed the mower around the wire and reached down to grab it, to throw it out of the way. It seems as though I hadn't remembered to unplug it after all.
Now I'm standing there, I've got the running lawnmower in my right hand and the 1.7 gigavolt fence wire in the other hand. Keep in mind the charger is about the size of a marine battery and has a picture of an upside down cow on fire on the cover. Time stood still. The first thing I notice is my testicles trying to climb up the front side of my body. My ears curled downwards and I could feel the lawnmower ignition firing in the backside of my brain. Every time that rolled over, I could feel the spark in my head. I was literally at one with the engine. It seems as though the fence charger and the POS lawnmower were fighting over who would control my electrical impulses.
Science says you cannot crap, pee, and nut at the same time. I beg to differ. Not only did I do all three at once, but my bowels emptied 3 different times in less than half of a second. It was a Matrix kind of bowel movement, where time is creeping along and you're all leaned back and BAM BAM BAM you just crap your pants 3 times. It seemed like there were minutes in between but in reality it was so close together it was like exhaust pulses from a big block Chevy turning 8 grand.
At this point I'm about 30 minutes (maybe 2 seconds) into holding onto the fence wire. My hand is wrapped around the wire palm down so I cant let go. I grew up on a farm so I know all about ... but Dad always had those POS chargers made by International or whoever that were like 9 volts and just kinda tickled. This I could not let go of. The 8 foot long ground rod is now accepting signals from me through the permadamp Ark-La-Tex river bottom soil. At this point I'm thinking I'm going to have to just man up and take it, until the lawnmower runs out of gas.
'Damn!,' I think, as I remember I just filled the tank! Now the lawnmower is starting to run rough. It has settled into a loping run pattern as if it had some kind of big lawnmower race cam in it. Covered in poop, pee, jizz, and with my testicles on my chest I think 'Oh God please die... pleeeeze die'. But nooooo, it settles into the rough lumpy cam idle nicely and remains there, like a big bore roller cam EFI motor waiting for the go command from its owner's right foot.
So here I am in the middle of July, 104 degrees, 80% humidity, standing in my own backyard, begging God to kill me. God did not take me that day... he left me there covered in my own fluids to writhe in the misery my own stupidity had created.
I honestly don't know how I got loose from the wire... I woke up laying on the ground hours later. The lawnmower was beside me, out of gas. It was later on in the day and I was sunburned. There were two large dead grass spots where i had been standing, and then another long skinny dead spot were the wire had laid while I was on the ground still holding on to it. I assume I finally had a seizure and in the resulting thrashing had somehow let go of the wire. Upon waking from my electrically induced sleep I realized a few things.
1- Three of my teeth seem to have melted.
2- I now have cramps in the bottoms of my feet and my right butt cheek (not the left, just the right).
3- Poop, pee, and other bodily fluids when all mixed together, do not smell as bad a you might think.
4- My left eye will not open.
5- My right eye will not close.
6- The lawnmower runs like a sumbitch now. Seriously! I think our little session cleared out some carbon fouling or something because it was better than new after that.
7- My testes are still smaller than average yet they are almost a foot long
8- I can turn on the TV in the living room by farting while thinking of the number 4 (still don't understand this?)
That day changed my life. I now have a new found respect for things. I appreciate the little things more, and now I always triple check to make sure the fence is unplugged before I mow.
The good news, is that if a burglar does try to come over the fence, I can clearly visualize what my security system will do to him, and THAT gives me a warm and fuzzy feeling all over, which also reminds me to triple check before I mow.
Saturday, January 3, 2009
1) You may need more sleep than you think.
Research by Henry Ford Hospital Sleep Disorders Center found that people who slept eight hours and then claimed they were "well rested" actually performed better and were more alert if they slept another two hours. That figures. Until the invention of the lightbulb (damn you, Edison!), the average person slumbered 10 hours a night.
2) Night owls are more creative.
Artists, writers, and coders typically fire on all cylinders by crashing near dawn and awakening at the crack of noon. In one study, "evening people" almost universally slam-dunked a standardized creativity test. Their early-bird brethren struggled for passing scores.
3) Rising early is stressful.
The stress hormone cortisol peaks in your blood around 7 am. So if you get up then, you may experience tension. Grab some extra Zs! You'll wake up feeling less like Bert, more like Ernie.
Friday, January 2, 2009
1. The world is a crazy place!
2. Goodnight my love was the last thing I said.
3. I sometimes wonder what things would be like if I had been the one to have his baby, so that we did not have to deal with her crazy ass!
4. Death is at the end of all things.
5. There's something to be said for peace and quiet!
6. Somewhere peaceful is where I want to be.
7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to well I am not sure now, tomorrow my plans include making a loaf of Pumpernickel for one of my friends and crafts with the kiddos and Sunday, I want to get pumped up for another week.
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