I am worried and I hate him being gone!

My hubby is in the hospital as of this morning. We think he will be having yet another skin graft surgery, his fourth in the last 16yrs for the abscess on his ankle. This was not a planned surgery, but he was in so much pain there was nothing else he could do so he went into the ER this morning just to get pain meds. He does not have insurance and we have had a lot of trouble getting him insured so his condition Protein S Deficiency has not been being treated like it should. When the doctor saw his leg he would not let him leave because he thought it was infected and they need to get that under control! God I hope this time the skin graft takes and his leg will be healed FINALLY! I have no idea how he has been able to work on his feet like he does....................it really makes me feel bad!!

So this will be his fourth skin graft and dammit I am determined to help this one heal as much as possible!!! My mom lives across the street this time so we have told him he is not allowed to even move off the couch except to pee during his recovery this time. lol Plus the kids are much older this time so they can help! I really hope it works this time I am not sure what will happen if it does not............................

I am so scared for him for so many reasons, I am so upset and sick to my stomach. I want him here next to me and I have no idea how I am gonna sleep without him here. All I can think about is how much pain he is in and how uncomfortable and unhappy he is by himself in the hospital! All I want to do is cry and I have to sit here all normal because I do not want the kids to freak out!